Learning How to Be a Good Listener

How often do you hear the phrase “you never listen to me” tossed around? That’s because listening has become something that a lot of people fail to do well. By failing to listen, we don’t connect with other people as deeply as we should.


One of the reasons why we fail to listen to people is because we fail to listen to ourselves. We’re so busy and so distracted that it’s easy to get lost inside our own heads and constantly move on to the next thought, the next task, and the next person.


It’s important that we take time out to learn how to listen. The same way we learnt to speak and to walk. We can take steps to be better listeners and communicators. As  Wivepreneurs, this is a big part of succeeding in all of our 5 core areas. You have to be a good listener and communicator when it comes to being in business, a parent, personal life, marriage and your social life too.

When you fail to listen to other people, part of the problem can be because you have something that you need or that you want to say to the other person. Your mind is busy formulating how you feel about the conversation. If you’re someone who struggles to listen well, one of the key symptoms of this trait is if you cut people off as they’re talking.


Another sign is if you’ve already decided what to say while the person is still in the middle of speaking. You’re more focused on being heard than you are listening. Being a good listener involves not allowing yourself to have a preformed opinion of what the other person is saying before they finish speaking.


It means paying attention to their words and emotions and trying to understand them. When you listen carefully and attentively, it lets the other person feel safe enough to express what they’re thinking and feeling because they know they’re going to be heard and supported.

To be mindful in listening first learn how to focus within yourself. To listen well means that you tune in to yourself first and then you’re able to hear others as they need to be heard. In the beginning it can be hard to move over and do this, so taking time out to compose yourself and tell yourself to focus can help center you.


You can keep control over your thoughts by not prejudging the other person’s intent before you’ve even had a chance to hear them out. Listening attentively also helps you to keep your emotion focused on the present with the person you’re speaking with.


This is especially helpful when you’re talking to someone that you’ve had issues with in the past or a close loved one who you know very well (for example your spouse, kids, best-friends and parents).


You’ll be able to motivate people and handle conflict more effectively. You’ll also be able to handle the stress more effectively that can occur when you’re dealing with people that it’s hard to communicate with. Being a good listener will help you be able to respond and clarify what you’ve heard so there is less miscommunication at home, in your business and with your loved ones.

Hi I’m Dr Norva Semoy Abiona, I work with ✨ Wivepreneurs – Wives who are entrepreneurs and may be Mothers or Executives too ✨. I help them to work on finding their unique life fusion in the 5 core areas of their life; marriage, business, parenting, personal life and social life. I have personally supported 100s of women on this same journey.

I want you and all the women who join my community to know that you can ‘Have It All’ and find your work-life balance (or business-life balance as I like to call it) that works for you and your loved ones.

Get in touch to find out more about being part of the Wivepreneurs Community!

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dr norva abiona wivepreneurs

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